One of the most profound ways to attract loving relationships of all kinds might surprise you, because it doesn’t involve taking smart action, understanding psychology, or learning better communication. One of the most profound ways to create loving relationships is to embrace unconditional love within you and all around you. But it’s also one of the hardest things for most people to do.
When you are trying to heal challenges in relationships, it might seem like embracing unconditional love won’t have any effect on relationships, or at worst that it is spiritual bypass. Yes, absolutely – all relationships need conscious tending to. Yes, we all have to work on our relationship “stuff.” And I have seen repeatedly that no matter how good someone is at working on their stuff, if they aren’t allowing themselves to receive Divine Love, their relationships will still suffer. This really surprised me when I realized it, but I was blown away when I saw the changes in my own life. Here’s how it works.
Divine Love is 360 degrees – all inclusive, inside and out. If you are resisting the 180 degrees inside, then you are in some ways blocking the 180 degrees outside too. If you are blocking love inside of you then that will inevitably be mirrored back to you outside of you.
The antidote is simple, in a way. Wherever you have been stingy with self, open up wide and receive greater love. Many of you have already had a taste of this and often feel it quite deeply. I want to support you to feel Divine Love within you 100% – unconditionally.
There are many ways you can be stingy with love inside yourself. Stinginess can result from:
- A part of yourself you haven’t forgiven
- A pocket of shame
- Diminishing or devaluing yourself (often because someone else when you were young diminished or devalued you)
- Feeling unworthy
- Internalized anger about life
- Protecting a part of your heart that has been hurt too many times
…Basically any reason or any way you resist receiving love. When you realize that these areas of stinginess are also opportunities to receive more love and to have more compassion for yourself, then you can begin to heal and receive the abundance of Divine Love. Then ultimately you can transform your relationships in surprising ways.
I was shocked to learn that not receiving the Divine’s abundance of love is a kind of arrogance. I realized I was telling God (as if I knew) that God couldn’t give me love because I wasn’t worthy. That’s a bit nuts, if you think about it. I had to be willing to trust that I could receive love 100% because love is inherent in me, it’s part of who I am, it’s part of God’s gift of Life.
When I stopped being stingy with myself, when I humbly allowed myself to unconditionally receive love, then more love came to me naturally. I was better able to receive the love that was already here.
The honest truth is that many people want to give love, but they are so used to having their love rejected that they are afraid to express it freely. So when I became a receptive conduit for love, others felt safer to express love with me. Magical.
I can’t tell you how often I learn that people are more open, comfortable and wise when they are with me than when they are with others. When I ask them why, I hear “I feel safe with you.” It’s not because I am so great or anything – it’s because I receive their heart. I am open to receiving one of the most precious parts of them – their love.
So what might happen in your life when you receive more love? What might happen when you are generous with yourself? You might just find yourself being so uncontrollably generous with others that the love in your life increases on all sides.